Reader "K" emailed to share a recent experience in hellish mother-in-law gifts. If you can call them that. Thanks, K.
My MIL is the worst gift-giver ever. Seriously, I don't know what her problem is, but if it's in the checkout line at Big Lots, or even better, at a garage sale, then it is purchased and shipped to my house and called a gift.
This Easter, like every other holiday, my kids got a package from their Mimi. A package of shit and the contents were the following:
- Magic Grow Kitty, a paper (?) cat that you add water to and watch it grow into something mommy throws into the trash.
- An elephant balloon. You know, every child wants one?!?!
- A fly trapped in plastic ice cube. Yes! Just what I wanted my daughter to own.
- A bubble blower from a wedding. Because nothing says cheap like I got you a free thing of bubbles.
- A Ziploc bag of hangers. Because its what I always wanted.
- An eyeball headband, what all the kids are wearing these days.
- A bunny purse filled with 15 plastic caterpillars. WTF?
- A jumbo 2ft long pencil. Because, you know, my kid is 3ft tall and needs a pencil this big?!?
- A magnet shaped like the state of Oklahoma, just to remind us how far away she lives. Thank God.
- Seven outfits for my son that are shockingly too small, as in 0-3 months size. My boy is 7 months old and wears size 12-18 months clothes.
Next time, just mail a card and put a $20 in it. Geez.