Thursday, June 11, 2009

But At Least She's Not A Nigger, Right, Ma?

Reader, Chatterbox Sara, shares more of her MIL with us. Read her other posts HERE.


Directly after meeting my future in-laws for the first time, as in, when they called to let us know they got home safely, N put MIL on speaker phone again and here's a snippet of the conversation, where MIL basically calls me a heifer.

N: I'm glad you guys made it home ok. Did you have a good time here?

MIL: It was nice. The food was soooo good that you two made. (Insert a long paragraph where she obsessed over my daughter and started crying about having to leave her.)

N interrupts the drama: I'm glad you see why I love them so much. I assume you guys like Sara and are ok with all this then?

MIL: Well, I didn't say that I particularly like Sara. I'm just so in love with her daughter. I guess if she makes you happy, I can overlook somethings.

N: Uhh, like what? I didn't see her do or say anything that should make you not like her.

MIL: It's just that she's so large. You always dated much smaller girls and I really liked that because that meant you would always have a wife who's thin and pretty.

N: Sara's not big, ma! I don't even think she's a size 8, plus she did just have a baby 5 months ago.

MIL: I'm just saying she could be smaller and prettier is all! I just don't think you'll be happy with a larger woman. I mean, fat people never get thinner, they just get fatter. I would know. What if in ten years, you don't find her attractive at all, then you'd have to get a divorce!

N: I happen to not have a problem with her size or looks, CLEARLY, since I'm dating her and would like to marry her eventually.

MIL: Well, I guess not everyone wants a thin or pretty wife. Just make sure that your choice really makes you happy.

N hung up on her then. They had several more fights over how inappropriate that was and then for a year straight she would make these smirking comments about how thiiiiiiiiiin I was and how greeeeeeeeeeeeeeat I looked. Ugh. Anytime we went out to eat, I would always order salads and water, and comment on how many calories or fat grams whatever she ate probably had. Mama didn't raise no coward! I guess, at least this time she wasn't being racist is a plus?

46 comments:

DKG aka Scrappy Doo said...

I would have had to jump through that phone line with my skinny little self and choke her!!!!!!!
I am a proud size 8

Vivienne @ the V Spot said...

Cah-razy.

bernthis said...

If you were a size 2 that nut job would have called you too thin. Someone please put her out of our misery

Kristina P. said...

I wondered where you went! I was worried the Devil killed you.

My size 12 ass is sitting here eating a big old bag of Almond M&Ms.

erin said...

This is an exact portrayal or my ex MIL. Part of the reason I couldn't stay with my ex-husband was that he put up with all her badmouthing me and hung out with her all the time like they were friends.
Jeremiah (the love of my life and the man that saved me from all that bullshit) ignores calls from his mom...even though she's super cool. Now, that's my type of man!

Fragrant Liar said...

Isn't there a movie about this? It's called Kill MIL. A lot of us could star in it.

Sara Rose said...

I find it hard to understand how someone who is 4 inches shorter than me (I'm 5'6) and over 100 lbs overweight, who eats like a trucker, feels its within her right to comment on her son's wife's looks and body. Just saying, is all. Just saying while I eat my big bowl of Heath Ice Cream with hot fudge.

Mouthy Housewife said...

this woman could clearly use a lot of advice from us.

Anna Russell said...

I see that obviously having just had a baby and being corerctly equipped to breat feed AND keep your own energy up doesn't seem to have figured with her. Grrrrrrrr!

Unknown said...

what a shallow shallow insecure person she must be. That's a shame

Miles said...

Sarah Rose, give me that heath bar ice cream immediately. Going to crazy town to visit the MIL this weekend, who wants in?

Dr Zibbs said...

Hey Daughter- thanks for visiting my blog and commenting.

I just gave you a shout out.

And you have one of the best avatars I've ever seen.

AVONLadyinSC said...

I love your blog found it tonight and can't believe your MIL..what a character..wow..I have to keep reading your blog now..I'm so hooked..

dila 54 said...

And I thought it was bad when I met my ILs. Hubbie introduced me as his fiance. They told him that he needed to discuss this with BJ, his x-wife. Was he sure that she did not want him back. He had not seen BJ for two years. What did she have that I didn't? An address in their town. That's it.

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